The Museum of Fat Love | On Exhibit | Monika and Joey

Monika and Joey

Joey and I met at a week long camping/music festival called Camp Trans. It's a space for transpeople and their allies/friends/partners to gather and socialize and feel safe. I went with two friends and didn't really know what to expect. When I arrived, one of the first people I saw sitting around the camp fire was an incredibly adorable transboy in overalls and a conductor hat. Of course, I also saw many other attractive people and kind of... expressed my sexuality in a number of safe, healthy and consensual situations. Unfortunately, none of these situations were with the cute country boy in the Carhartts. I would, when I saw him, try to flirt with him, but he never really responded to my advances and because I was entertaining a couple of suitors at the time, decided to cut my losses and focus my attention elsewhere. He was my Camp crush; I would get so nervous and anxious around him. I just assumed he was out of my league.

When camp ended, the facebook pictures started being put up. One of my friends put of picture of Joey and I left a comment on it almost immediately that said, "Why didn't I hit on Joey more?". I left my house to go to work and in the middle of my shift, my shoe broke. The plan that night was to leave from work and go one a date with a girl I had been on a few dates with before camp, so I decided to go home on my break and change shoes. When I was home, I quickly checked my facebook to see that I had a new friend request. How embarrassing! It was Joey, who had clearly found me through my hilariously awkward comment on his picture. I added him, only to almost immediately hear the familiar click noise of facebook chat. We talked for maybe 10 seconds before we made the same "that's what she said" joke. I jokingly said that we were on the same wavelength, most likely because we were both so hot. As soon as I tried to take it back, saying, "I'm just kidding, you're way hotter than me!", he said something like, "I have my moments, but you're way hotter than me." Then there was the pause. Then there was the, "Wait... what?" moment. "Are you saying I could have had a chance with you at Camp?!" I demand. "You wanted a chance?" he asked.

It turns out that we both had monstrously large crushes on each other for a week but were way too chicken to act on them. We both thought the other was out of our league! But keep in mind, I was still on a 30 minute break before having to go back to work. I had to cut the conversation short, and it ended with both of us cursing our lack of courage and, of course, the 744 miles that seperates Milwaukee, Wisconsin from Asheville, North Carolina. I go back to work, frustrated as hell, and texting Joey's best friend in NC/one of my best friends from camp to yell at hif for not telling me that Joey liked me. Ze and I text a little while at work, but eventually I put my phone away and wait for my shift to be over. As I'm walking out of the store after closing up, I get a text from hir: "Joey and I are driving to Chicago. See you in the morning." I immediately call hir and ze tells me that ze and Joey were on their way to a lumberjack party when they just looked at eachother and decided to drive to Chicago (that's where zir girlfriend, whom ze also met at Camp, lives).

12 hours later, Joey's walking into my apartment at 10 am and that was it. Actually, first he told me he brought a sleeping bag and pillow so I wouldn't feel pressured into letting him into my bed and doing anything I didn't want to do (who does that?). Then that was it. He's basically it for me. I've gone through so much crap with so many partners and now I finally realize what the point is. The point is to find someone like Joey.

So there's my big fat queer love story. And I enjoy it.




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